Despair is among the most common motives for suicide. Experts studying 80 suicide cases in the state of Washington suggested physical illness, including cancer, heart disease and arthritis, contributed to half of those suicides. Facing a chronic, painful, and potentially disabling illness, CFIDS patients are clearly at risk for suicide. Neglected and often disbelieved by the medical community, the public, family and friends, persons with CFIDS (PWCs) can quickly become isolated.

Further, the severe pain experienced by some PWCs and the chronicity of the illness play a role in putting PWCs at risk for suicide. The secondary depression that can accompany CFIDS adds to that risk.

Warning Signs
Most people have a stronger wish to live than to die so suicide can be preventable. There are warning signs to watch for and steps you can take to help someone who is thinking about suicide. Take notice if a person…

• Talks about or mentions suicide
• Expresses feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, or helplessness
• Withdraws from friends and family
• Expresses the pain (physical or emotional) has exceeded his or her ability to cope
• Has a preoccupation with death or preparation for death
• Loses interest in activities he or she once enjoyed
• Calls or visits people to say goodbye
• Gives away possessions
• Stockpiles drugs
• Has a sudden mood change from despair to peace or “high spirits”

This is not a comprehensive list, nor is it a checklist. A person who is suicidal does not need to exhibit all of these things or even a majority of them. If you recognize one or a few behaviors, or if someone specifically mentions suicide, take it seriously.

What you can do

• Listen. It is vitally important that people in an emotional crisis have someone who will listen and really hear what they are saying. Try to establish a connection with the feelings beneath the words.
• Ask about suicide. Be up-front. “Are you thinking of suicide?” There’s no harm bringing up the subject. Often the individual will respond to the question and is glad to have the opportunity to bring the issue out in the open.
• Take any mention of suicide seriously. Do not undervalue or dismiss what the person is saying. Some patients may express feelings in a low key manner, but behind this apparent calm may be profound distress. It is better to be overly cautious than not cautious enough.
• Don’t judge. Just be there. The problem may seem insignificant to you, but remember that the pain it is causing the person is great enough to make them consider suicide. According to David Conroy, PhD, author of Out of the Nightmare: Recovery From Depression And Suicidal Pain, “It is not how bad the problem is, but how bad it is hurting the person who has it.”
• Don’t handle it alone. Have the number of your local Suicide Hotline readily available (you can find it in the front of your telephone book). A local number is best but there is also a national crisis number that can be used: 800-999-9999.
• Get professional help. Suggest counseling or if you are with someone who is suicidal, take them to a crisis center or emergency room.
• Remember this. You can offer support, compassion and hope to a suicidal caller or friend, but the ultimate action of that person cannot be controlled by you. It’s not your fault if someone makes the decision to complete a suicide.

Other Resources

• National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/default.aspx
• National Crisis Hotline: 800-999-9999; will counsel callers or give referral numbers for local crisis centers
• Suicide Awareness\Voices of Education (SA\VE) is an organization dedicated to educating the public about suicide prevention.

The Association’s brochure, “ Preventing & Coping with Suicide: For Those Helping Persons with Chronic Fatigue and Immune Dysfunction Syndrome (CFIDS)” provides additional information to help cope with the difficult issue of suicide.