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Holiday Hot Tips

Tips for People with CFIDS (PWC's)

  • Spend your holidays surrounded by understanding friends and family, avoiding those who are critical of your illness. 
  • When a holiday approaches, try focusing on the meaning of the holiday and how it relates to your life, instead of the pressures that holiday can create. Bill Gareau and Lisa Burdick, Counselors
  • Putting yourself at the top of your holiday gift list doesn't necessarily involve material gifts. You can put yourself at the top of your gift list simply by only doing those things that are for your highest good. Bill Gareau and Lisa Burdick, Counselors
  • Make a list of what you'd like to accomplish, making sure you schedule time to rest and take care of yourself. 
  • Delegate as many holiday-related jobs as possible to your supportive friends and family members. 
  • We must allow ourselves to receive graciously, gratefully, and unconditionally. The "Oh, you really shouldn't have..." syndrome is damning to your self-esteem. It's a way of saying, "I'm not really worth it" and it takes joy away from the giver ("Gee, maybe I really shouldn't have!). Recognize that the giver chose to offer you this gift and allow yourself to bask in the feeling of love or appreciation that the gift represents. Bill Gareau and Lisa Burdick, Counselors
  • Limit your activities — perhaps you purchase that special dessert this year as opposed to making it yourself. 
  • Limit your travel by requesting that friends and family visit you instead. Or ask them to combine get togethers at a central location. 
  • Decide what your holiday of choice means to you and begin to sift through all the "traditions" (many of them created by retailers) to find which ones you can do and, more importantly, which ones you want to do. Bill Gareau and Lisa Burdick, Counselors
  • Watch what you eat and drink. Try not to overindulge in less-healthy foods.
    S. Jenkins, SD
  • Dispose of the guilt you may feel for not celebrating the holidays "right." Taking care of yourself, in whatever fashion necessary, is right. Knowing your boundaries and staying within them is right. Bill Gareau and Lisa Burdick, Counselors
  • Watch your spending by prioritizing your gift giving and, if possible, let someone else do the shopping for you by participating in group gifts. S. Jenkins, SD
  • Let your inner child play. Challenge feelings of guilt, shame, and inadequacy by validating your intrinsic value, worth, and beauty. Do whatever it takes to give yourself the gift of peace of mind. Bill Gareau and Lisa Burdick, Counselors

For caregivers, family members and friends:

  • Be as flexible as you can, altering family roles and responsibilities as appropriate.
    P. Brown, MI
  • Keep holiday plans tentative whenever possible. Formulate alternate plans in case the PWC is too ill to participate in certain activities. C. Canton, CA
  • Focus on the meaning of the holiday, not the many (and often overwhelming) activities related to it, to help eliminate some of the pressures that the holiday may put on your loved one. P. Brown, MI
  • Offer to help in specific ways, e.g., running errands, mailing holiday cards,
    wrapping gifts.  
  • Take time for yourself and your needs during the holiday season, and year round. Remember, to meet another’s needs, you must first take care of your own.  
  • Understand that the PWC may have to limit their holiday activities and engagements. Help create a "new normal;" challenge old traditions and start new ones that are manageable, enjoyable and meaningful for you and the PWC. C. Canton, CA


For more tips on a wide variety of topics visit our Website at http://www.cfids.org/hot_tips.asp.